This is a night of despair

Even though I am not alone

I feel as though I am

Not just alone

But the sole inhabitant in the universe

As if there weren’t even a God

Today I am a ship

Alone on the sea

Heading into the biggest hurricane that ever was

No matter what direction I turn the bow

We still move toward the storm

I haven’t felt this low in a long, long time

I knew something was coming

Because no radio station sounded right

Its hard to explain

Without sounding like a complete idiot

But when the shift comes

There is usually a burning plastic smell

That only I can smell

And none of the music that I usually listen to feels right

There is no burning plastic smell today

But everything seems to be just a bit off

As though my timing chain had jumped out of time

I can’t seem to remember even the simplest of things

And I was even pulled over

for going fifteen mph over in Horseshoe bend

I usually piss people off for going too slow.

I haven’t gotten a speeding ticket in over ten years

Everything is off kilter

The worst part is

That there really isn’t a reason for it

It just is.

Today

For the first time in a long time

I truly want to die

Instead

I grabbed the whisky bottle

Poured a glass ¾ full and added a dash of cola

I still have to feed the animals tonight

But first

I will become

Comfortably numb

Tonight the nothing will consume me