July 3^rd 2008

Mornings - Camping in the Parking Lot

I awoke this morning to the sound of my security guards voice. I rolled off of the military cot that I sleep on and tried to stand up straight. It seems to take longer every day to stand straight after a night on that cot. I didn't want it to be morning but life seems to be easier when you don't have a choice about things like that. I got up put my bed away and walked Tinydog. He won't pee in the tent he still wants to go "outside". I walked him and then returned to the tent. My guard left and I am on my own until ten AM. The police will be here then. We have stepped up our security. Yesterday I sold over $1000 worth of fireworks.

I sat down and turned on the John boy and Billy show. And enjoyed the light breeze and the sunrise. I have had about $50 in sales and it isn't even 8:30 am.

Mornings are peaceful here in the lot. I wake up at about 6:30, I usually sit until 11:00 before we have customers.

There is a lady that does laps in the parking lot. It took about a week before she would say hi to me. Now she waves every morning.

There is a grandmother and her grand daughter that passes by every morning and sometimes in the after noon. The grandmother wouldn't even acknowledge my existence for the longest time but I would wave at her every morning anyway. She stopped in and bought a package of sparklers a couple of days age. I felt good that she went from not even noticing me to actually coming in the tent.  

Next we have grandpa man. He isn't old enough to be my grandfather, actually he is probably my mothers age. He comes by every morning on his way to buy an egg mc-muffin and a coffee at McDonalds. He is kind and he has stories to tell. He is encouraging and he is a very peaceful man. He offered to buy tiny an egg mc-muffin yesterday. He told me he just bought a Harley and he is learning to rid it. I am envious but it still makes me uncomfortable that he is so nice and he lives in the city. It just doesn't mesh well. City and nice are contradictions in terms.

A dark skinned man named Eric comes by almost every morning he asks for money sometimes and brings me things that he wants to sell. Last night I slept through his visit and my security guard sent him away. He brought a guy that had guns for sale. I wish I would have woke up, he had a little 25 caliber and I really want one of those. He also had a sawed off shotgun and various other guns and I slept right through it. To tell you just how tired I was the friend of my security guard drove down to wal-mart and got us some wrist rockets and ammo. I held out eleven dollars for him and while I was waiting for him to take it I fell asleep and dropped it on the ground. I wish I would have been awake. Maybe he will come back tonight.

On the lot there is movement everywhere. There is a six lane highway right behind me and cars driving through the parking lot. The crack-heads are plentiful and there is noise everywhere. I do not like noise. I think that that is one of the worst parts of sitting on the corner of Eisenhower Parkway and Pio Nano Avenue. I have lived without walls for fifteen days. The wind is a different creature when you don't have walls. The rain is different when you don't have a floor. When it rains there is a river that runs down the center of my tent and I can't even fish in it. The Sun is something different too. You can't hide from it. It heats the black top and even in the tent it is so hot that you just want it all to stop. It moves across the sky in an attempt to find a way to shine on you. In the morning I can hide from it but by the end of the day It sneaks around and shines in my eyes. Its long hours of stalking me have paid off and it has me right where it wants me. I love the out doors but sometimes there is just a need to be inside, at least for an hour or so.

The days are long here, I have the tent open for 12 to 14 hours each day and time here is warped in such a way as to make you believe that there are two or three days all stuffed into one. Sleep , exhaustion, almost falling asleep while standing, these all help to warp my perception of time. It somehow makes forever seem longer then it does any other time. I can now imagine at least on a miniscule level what eternity means. In order to survive here you just have to turn time off in your mind. Your perception of it has to be altered. I just fell asleep writing this. I just now woke up and I am wondering how long I was out. I just did it again. I think I am going to stop now and turn on my alarms and see if I can get a few minutes of sleep without getting robbed.

Well my friends life in the lot is hard for these street people but they have made the choice to be here. I have no sympathy for them. They could hitch hike out into an area where there is a forest and live a good life. They choose not to. Thy could go where there is free food growing all around and all they have to do is set some traps or throw out a line to catch dinner. No sympathy, Nope, None at all.