(Rough Draft)

Today’s word of the day is perspective

Our interpretations of the events that shape this world are based on our own perspective. I was very fortunate as a child. I got to experience things that helped me to see the world a little different then the people in mainstream society. I am very thankful for that.

                There is a problem that most of us experience. I believe that this problem is caused by relaxing our mind. The problem is that we get to a place where we have accomplished some of our goals and we relax, we get complacent.

                I remember when I was younger and I really didn’t believe that I would ever have my own land. I had a bit of resentment toward people that had things that I didn’t. One specific memory was about a house that had become very run down. It had wooden siding that screamed for paint. The roof needed shingles. It was a mess. I wanted that house so bad. I was angry that the people living there didn’t appreciate what they had. I told myself that if that was my house I would paint it and fix it all up. I made plans for that house in my mind, I made it look amazing.

                As I write this, I’m sitting in my own home. My yard is a mess and my home needs a lot of work.  It isn’t this way because I don’t have the means to change it. It is this way because I have become complacent. Now that I have my own land, the importance of having it has faded. I see the need for paint and the need for simple things like cleaning out the gutters but it doesn’t seem to matter.

                I think that most of us get used to having something and our mind floats off toward what we don’t have. If this theory is true then my question is, does getting what we want really make a difference. When we get a raise the importance of it fades shortly, we get used to the new income and we want another raise. When all that we desired was to graduate from high school, it consumed our thoughts. It didn’t take long for the joy of graduation to pass. The same thing occurred when we got our first apartment. Another aspect of how perspective affects our life is how we look at others.

                In our home we make fun of drug users. I made it a point to do this because I wanted it to be second nature for my daughter to think of drugs a something that only stupid people did. I have known many drug addicts. I look at them like most people do; I say to myself, why would anybody, in this day and age try a drug that everybody knows is additive. The use of legal drugs is just as disturbing to me. Cigarettes have a warning right on the label that says that smoking may be hazardous to your health. Every young person that tries smoking for the first time, at least in modern times, has known a Tobacco addict that wanted to quit but couldn’t, yet they try it anyway.

I have always hated smoking. I have always compared cigarettes to any other drug out there. I made jokes about smokers and the “smoker’s stench” that follows them around. The stink is horrible but they are so used to it that they don’t even realize that they stink.

I looked at the addicts of the world with pity and revulsion. I understand their plight more than most Americans because I’ve been right there beside them. I’ve experienced life with them. Over the years I’ve turned most of my revulsion for them into sympathy but I still judge them.

There is a local girl here that is an addict. She recently lost her daughter. I saw it coming. I saw it because I lived it, not as the addict but as the child of the addict. I tried to encourage this person, I tried to inspire her, and all the while I looked at her as my mother. I saw her making the choice to hurt her child and make the child go through hell.

There is a local guy that wanted to fight me, he tried to provoke me. My only response to him was why would you choose drugs over your family? The sad part is that what I saw in him wasn’t that he was some meth head. What I saw in him was myself. I saw him making a mistake that I had made 17 years earlier. My drug of choice wasn’t meth, my drug was working. I worked as much as 18 to 23 hours a day. When I wasn’t working I either slept or I drank too much. I lost my family and I saw him on the same path. He lost his wife and daughter shortly after our confrontation.

With all of this in mind, I sit here on my couch. I am wearing the largest size clothing that is available without going to a special big and tall clothing store. I am playing the fact that there isn’t any alcohol in the house over and over in my head. I am trying to justify running over to the next county and buying beer because, Mandy deserves to have some when she gets off of work after putting in 36 hours in 3 days. The truth is that I am an alcoholic. I seldom drink before 8pm and I seldom drink more then I should on a school night and I never drink and drive but I’m still an alcoholic. I am also addicted to the high that I get after I eat carbohydrates. The food calms me. I don’t know whether this is considered a real addiction but looking at the science behind the theory of insulin resistance and knowing the cravings when my blood sugar drops makes me believe that it is.

It’s all about perspective. I look at the drug addicts without seeing my own addictions. I let my home repairs slide in favor of either sleep or other leisure activities even though I said I would never be like that. I have an intelligent mind and I have the ability to get a high paying job yet I sit here. I look at those that have no ambition, they don’t go to school or work, they have no thirst for knowledge, yet I am letting my abilities go to waste. We have military veterans that gave their arms and legs for our country, a country where someone like me can sit and not use the arms and legs that I have for anything other than clicking a mouse or getting to the other room.

Today’s word of the day is perspective, I am going to take a step back, get a different angle on things, a different perspective if you will. I challenge you to do the same thing, not just today but several times a month. If we can understand each other’s struggles better we can become more compassionate and in doing so we will make the world a better place, one act of kindness at a time.