As We Get Older

 

As we get older we evolve

We change with age

We do this because

we experience new things

all of the time

 

I’ve been asked in the past

What’s so important

about having your spouse

be your best friend

 

Without getting

into the details of why

that I think that its important

 

I’ll just answer the basic question.

 

Because as we get older

We evolve

We aren’t the same people

that we were 10 years ago

or even 5 years ago

 

If you spend most of your time together

Doing things as a family

You have a better chance

Of evolving in the same direction

 

If you spend most of your time

Hanging around other friends

Instead of your spouse

 

You’ll find that you slowly grow

in different directions

having less and less in common each year

until you finally start to wonder

what you ever saw in that person in the beginning.

 

You don’t need to spend

every waking hour together

and you can even have

a night out away from your spouse

if you both agree on it

 

 

but when you get home from work

if you make your family your focus

you will evolve together

your new likes will be similar

to those of your spouse

because

you will both be introduced to things

in the same way

 

you will tend to keep doing

the things that you both like

and the things

that only one of you like

will just seem to fall away

not necessarily forgotten

 

but they will discontinue growing

 

instead of becoming more important in your life

and putting a wedge

between you and your spouse

 

their importance will lessen in time

 

the things you continue to share

will blossom and grow

as will your relationship

 

--------

The seven year itch

Has a chemical base in reality

 

It’s understood

that as the “love” chemicals change

 (Adrenalin, Serotonin, and Dopamine)

after 3 – 4 years if you don’t have children and about 7 years if you do have children

 

These chemicals may not really decrease

you may simply get used to them

but the point is

that at the 4 year point

people tend to stop feeling as “in love”

 

it’s a chemical thing

plain and simple

 

how can we get past this chemical situation?

 

if you spend your time together

you evolve together

and your spouse remains your best friend

long into your golden years.

 

If you spend your free time

doing things with other people

instead of your spouse

when those chemicals lose their zing

 

you’ll either separate

or stay together wondering what happened

and not be happy.

 

That

my friends

Is why it’s important

At least in my opinion

For your spouse to be your best friend

 

 

 

Here are a couple links for you to check out

http://www.abcfreestuff.com/love.htm

http://www.youramazingbrain.org.uk/lovesex/sciencelove.htm