My Ferris Wheel Theory

I’ve spent a good portion of my life around troubled people

Both, when I was in counseling,

and just because I didn’t fit in with the “Normal” people

 

I’m what I refer to as a people watcher

I can sit and watch people at the mall

Noting how they interact

And how they react to various things

 

I can pick out the people that have good coping skills,

The ones with minimal coping skills,

The ones that really feel the need to fit in.

I study everything and everybody

I don’t do it as much anymore

Because I choose to keep human contact to a minimum.

 

I found my schizophrenic friends very interesting

One of them really played it up to stay on disability

He went duck hunting in his back yard

He lived in the city

 

 

Another one of my friends was in the state hospital

He was working at a department store during the Christmas rush

When I first encountered him

He was in a safe room, padded walls and all

He kept yelling “Next” every few seconds

He had just been to overwhelmed by the crowds

He had what I was told was a psychotic break

He was really out there

But after a couple of days

He was just as “Normal”

as anybody that you would meet on the street.

In fact he was one of the most intelligent

and knowledgeable people

that I have ever had the good fortune to meet.

 

 

I’ve met a lot of great people in the mental health area

On both sides of the fence

Both the counselors and the troubled people

 

One day I was sitting with a man

I was questioning him in a relaxed manor

And he kept watching a picture on the wall

 

He would stop for a while and just watch it.

 

After a while I asked him what he was doing

 

He told me the picture was spinning

 

I casually asked him what he meant

Over time he told me of how a lot of pictures would do that

And how he couldn’t stop them from spinning

 

I noted this in the back of my mind

 

Over time I talked to more schizophrenic people

A surprising number of them talked about spinning things

 

One day while contemplating this

I pictured a Ferris wheel in my mind

I pictured it spinning

And I couldn’t make it stop spinning where I wanted it to stop

 

I was a bit concerned

But not too worried

It definitely deserved some time and study though

 

 

I pictured the whole wheel and all but one of the cars as red

I pictured one car bright yellow

I pictured it spinning

 

For the life of me

I could not stop the yellow car at the bottom

 

I used to have a mild case of OCD

Checking the stove several times and the door locks

I even had to check my alarm clock several times

 

Most of this was right after my daughter was born

And I attributed it to my fear of not being a good enough father

Or that something that I would do would hurt her.

 

Over time I practiced with the Ferris wheel

I got to where I could stop the yellow car at the bottom

With even more practice

I got to where I could stop it anywhere

I could spin it fast or slow

I could change directions exactly when I wanted to

I eventually mastered the Ferris wheel

 

Before I knew it I didn’t have any signs of OCD

 

Strange

I wondered if there was a connection

 

I talked to more schizophrenic people

I even introduced to concept to my “Normal” friends

 

Most could spin the Ferris wheel but few could control it

I found that the less troubled that my friends seemed to be

The faster that they mastered the wheel

Most of them took less than an afternoon to master it

 

The more troubled that a person was

and the more out of control

that they felt that their life was

the harder it was to control the Ferris Wheel

 

I have come to believe that there is a connection between

Feeling out of control

Which creates the need to control the things around you

And the ability to control the Ferris wheel.

 

I have found that people that gain the control of the Ferris wheel

Often learn to quiet their mind and sooth that out of control feeling

 

Once they sooth that feeling of turmoil in their lives

They can reduce the need to be controlling

And the people that interact with them

find them much more pleasant to be around.

 

So that’s my Ferris Wheel theory

Take it for what it’s worth.