THEDOOGIEMAN.COM

Fractured Soul - AKA - Ghost Child

2012-05-28T05:57:29Z

I think that we are all ghosts

But in reverse

We are the ones who are haunted

By the thing that killed our soul

All of those years ago

That one thing

That last straw

Where our sanity

was stretched so far

that it snapped

on that day

we broke

our soul fractured

and a piece of it remained there

in that time and place

that thing haunts us

it stalks us

it is relentless

it never gives up

it only pretends to

when we are tired or alone

it comes for us

and all the while

our fractured soul

is searching for that missing piece

yes, I think that we are ghosts

we are ghosts of a child

that was so broken by an event

that it killed a part of us

Worm Food

2012-05-27T20:20:18Z

once again I have eaten too much.

Some day I'll get to the point where I just eat for the nutrition and not because food is the most awesome thing on the planet.

think about it, everything in nature and every person is food to something. What if we find out that we were really here to eat and be eaten?

Cows are great animals and baby cows are cute but they are delicious.

I bet under the right circumstances I could make some bugs and worms very happy some day

I want to draw

2012-05-27T00:33:32Z

I want to draw

I want to draw with huge slashing strokes

I want to draw with deep rich colors

I want to create something
that will express emotion and inspire revolution

I want to draw

The Drive

2012-05-26T02:11:26Z

The ground shook violently,
opened up,

pus oozed from the cracks.

The stench of decay,
covered the putrid landscape.

Even the young
were thrown in to the pit

The innocent were no more

Desecration of anything

even resembling
purity

was driven

by the lust of the dead

every step was pain

every motion, agony

maggot filled open wounds

peeked from beneath

skimpy rotting bikinis

whores

every one of us

selling whatever’s left

for the tiniest taste

of something

to take away the pain

syringes stuck deep in flesh

hanging unnoticed

but I saw

I watched it bob and weave

with every step

of the girl

that I used to go to school with

her face

so different

from that cheerleader

that I knew so long ago

the scars of life

cut deeply into her face

the uncovered breast

a revolting sight

bile crept up in my throat

what’s going on

what happened

a hallow scream rose

from deep within me

as I looked down

at the bones of my arm

little bits of flesh

still clung to the tendons

I reached up to my chest

My fingers sank deep

in to the rotting meat

the steering wheel

the windshield

the road

it all came back to me

in a rush

What the hell

Auto Parts Warehouse - Review

2012-05-25T03:55:34Z

Auto Parts Warehouse

I recently purchased some car parts online at Auto Parts Warehouse. We had a bit of a situation at first because of my location. I live in the Ozarks and the situation occurred when the delivery company couldn’t get the part to us.

I put an angry message on their facebook page and they responded in a kind way. They took care of the situation and I not only received my parts but they went above and beyond the call of duty to make things up to me.

If you are interested in shopping for car parts online you have a lot of choices but I can tell you that Auto Parts Warehouse will give you good parts, good service and a good price.

Here is the link, check them out.

http://www.autopartswarehouse.com/

Memories of Never

2012-05-22T08:22:39Z

I spent the last hour looking up an old friend. I found his address and his wife's name.

Can't find a facebook page for either of them.

I found an obituary in a different town but I don't think its him.

If I have learned one thing over the last few years it is this - the memories are always better than the reality.

Let’s just leave the friends from my past in my memories. Age and time have a way of destroying everything but memories. If you’re good, over time you can shape the memories in to anything that you like. You can smooth the edges, soften the harshness of certain parts, and intensify the clarity of the parts that were good.

I am kind of looking forward to senility

I've got a lot to forget

This friend was an old computer programming buddy. We took a 27 state trip together. 9040 miles in two weeks. That's what happens when you get 2 manic people together. Good times. That's one memory that I don't want to go away.

when you think about it our perception of fantasy, reality, and even real life are all just electrical impulses. None of it is real. It is only our perception of reality. Obviously something would have to be lost in the translation from reality to electrical impulses so how do we ever know what is real?

your perceived reality is different than my perceived reality and both are different than true reality. No wonder we spend so much time and money killing each other.

It is time for me to imagine myself sleeping. If I'm good enough at it I just might feel like I've rested when I decide to believe that I've woken up.

Ya Gotta Find What Works

2012-05-20T06:09:49Z

Ya Gotta Find What Works

several years ago

I don’t know how many

It could be as far back as 1997

I tried to take my life

The person that I loved had died in bed beside me

She didn’t love me

But I was the best that she had

At least the last time that she got sick

she thought that she had beaten the cancer

so did I

we found out different

after she died

I made it a few weeks

maybe more

I don’t remember much of that time

I drank a fifth of vodka

I took every pill in the house

The doctor said it was the most pills
that he had ever seen anybody take and live

I spent 2 ½ weeks in a coma

I lived a 30 year hallucination during that time

It was worse than any horror show
that has ever been invented

because it was interactive

I lived a lifetime in that coma

you’ll find people that say it can’t be true

but I lived it

Present day

I am feeling a lot of the same feelings lately

but the reasons are mine and mine alone

There is nothing
to do with reality

it is my own feelings of incompetence

I’m not in any danger

I will never try it again

but my message is the same to all of you
that are struggling with this every day of your life

Ya Gotta Find What Works

each and every day

you have to find whatever it takes

to get through the day

because tomorrow could be different

sometimes it isn’t

some days are different

Here is the story of when I tried it

there has been some fictional freedom

added to the story

but the basic story is true

http://thedoogieman.com/2010/10/08/the-thing-in-the-closet--a-work-in-progress.aspx

My message to you is this

Ya gotta find what works

I’ll hold on if you will

Come on my friend
you can make it

Do-Se-D0

2012-05-19T13:11:34Z

Days and nights
they do-se-do
in an unending dance

they lead us all
we bow and dip
it goes on and on

the morning comes
it starts each day
followed by the night

we dip and whirl
as time goes on
yesterdays a blur

memories fades
but are they real
sometimes it’s hard to tell

does it even matter
who we were or are
when it’s all said and done

our endings our beginning
we start and end as dust

the world, it turns
continues on
until the end of time

when is that
we do not know
we just do-se-do